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Not The Seven Hills Of Edinburgh Challenge (Andrew)

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I don’t know much about Edinburgh. It was Iain TwinBikeRun’s city. I lived in Glasgow, he lived in Edinburgh. Together we divided up Scotland like a giant game of Monopoly.

So, when Iain asked if I wanted to try the Seven Hills of Edinburgh Challenge – a run to summit the seven hills that make up Edinburgh – I asked how long would it take. He said about two to two and half hours. I asked how many miles it would be. He said about 12. And I said, “hell yeah, let’s do it!”

(I might not have said “hell yeah” as I’m not American, but I was excited.)

There was only one problem. The run is no where near 12 miles. We had ran 16 miles and still not reached the sixth and toughest hill, Arthur’s Seat. We’d also been running for nearly three hours and still had another 45 minutes to go. I had no choice but to say “see ya, sucker!” and run back to the start.

So, instead of the Seven Hills of Edinburgh Challenge, I ran the Seven Hills of Edinburgh Minus Arthur’s Seat Challenge and I learned an important lesson: never trust Iain TwinBikeRun’s directions. I should have known better, I should have read this, where he admits to running eight hills because he got the route wrong. In future, I should always check the route I’m running before I run it.

Iain

Outdoor Swim Review: North Third Reservoir – May 2022 (Iain)

I previosuly wrote about North third here https://twinbikerun.com/2019/07/19/outdoor-swim-review-north-third-reservoir-iain/ and here https://twinbikerun.com/2021/05/18/rugged-run-north-third-reservoir/

In recent years there hasn’t been as much water in North Third as there was when I wrote my intial review. I decided to pop by (May 2022) to see what the water level was like this year but it was still very low.

Which is disappointing as my usual swim would actually be mostly walking. The water was that low.

I suspect it will be like that for the rest of the summer. Ill keep an eye on it and hope it improves but I don’t think I’ll get any swimming here.

REVIEW (when the water was full)

Ease of Access: There’s a small car park beside a gate next to the path that leads down to the reservoir. If the spaces there are taken then there’s spots nearby to park.

Water quality: A bit murky and a little bit shallow in places. There was much less water in the reservoir than when I was last here in March. The water temperature was 18.5C.

Swim Quality: Excellent – There’s a nice loop around the islands. The water was calm.

Other People: There’s usually folk fishing at the side of the loch and I’ve occasionally bumped into other folk either heading in or leaving after swimming themselves.

Would I go back: Yes. Its one of my favorite places to swim.

Andrew, The Sound of Football

The Sound of Football: Brentford (Andrew)

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Every fortnight we cover the best and worst football songs from every club in the UK from our book ‘The Sound Of Football: Every Club, Every Song’. You can buy it here

Brentford

Nickname: The Bees

Ground: Griffin Park

Stadium Capacity: 12,763

Song: Hey Jude

Did Rod Stewart play for Brentford? We know that his first love was football, closely followed by blondes and platform shoes. On his hit song, ‘You’re In My Heart (The Final Acclaim),’ he compared one of his conquests with the best team he’d ever seen. Better even than Manchester United or his beloved Celtic. Was Rod talking about Brentford?

For years, the press would write that Rod had played for The Bees as a young man. But, in 1995, he finally confessed he’d never played at Griffin Park. He’d only had a trial as a schoolboy. We think we can now assume that Brentford was not the best team he’d ever seen.

One man believes Brentford was the best team he’s ever seen, and that’s ex-player Lloyd Owusu.

Owusu joined Brentford from non-league Slough in 1998 and immediately made an impact, helping the team to promotion. He finished top scorer with an impressive 22 goals. Over the next few years, he continued to feature prominently and became a fan’s favourite due to his ‘raise the roof` goal celebrations

Although Owusu left the club briefly, he returned in 2005 for a second spell. The fans welcomed his return, and one in particular – Status Quo bassist John ‘Rhino` Edwards – even created a tribute song, ‘Owusu The One And Only, in his honour.

Brentford’s club song is ‘Hey Jude’ by the Beatles, played at every home game. For the chorus, the fans sing:

“Laaa Laaa Laaa La-la-la Laaa

La-la-la Laaa Brentford

Laaa Laaa Laaa La-la-la Laaa

La-la-la Laaa Brentford“

(Source: fan chant)

There are two theories why the fans sing Hey Jude. The first is that a woman named Jude in the 1960s dumped a Brentford player, and the club played the song to remind him of her. The second theory is more straightforward – and more plausible – it was simply started by supporters who spotted that the chants of “Hey Jude” could be easily swapped with “Brent-ford“.

‘Hey Jude’ is one of The Beatles’ greatest songs, but drummer Ringo Starr almost didn’t play on it. The band was ready to record the track, but Ringo went to the toilet before they started. The rest of the band didn’t notice he had gone. He heard Paul McCartney singing and ran back in time to hit his drums right on cue.

John Lennon may have once said that Ringo wasn’t “even the best drummer in The Beatles“, but Ringo knew, like all great drummers, that timing is everything.

Buy the Sound of Football from Amazon.

Andrew

The Joy Of Socks (Andrew)

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Once a week I run at lunchtime from our office in Larbert. I usually prepare my bag the night before so I have my kit, my towel, a change of clothes and my trainers. I was a Boy Scout. Be prepared!

Except, I wasn’t a very good Boy Scout, and a couple of weeks back I forgot the most important item of all. Not my towel, there’s always ways to dry off even if you forget a towel, including but not limited to a roll of toilet paper, which we shall never speak about.

No, the worst item you can forget is a fresh pair of socks. Once you’ve been running you don’t want to wear your socks again. They need to be banished into the darkest deepest parts of your bag so that the smell is smothered until you fish them out later with a pair of tongs to throw them in the washing machine.

But if you have no socks, what do you do? Nothing. You can’t wear loo roll on your feet. Nor can colour in your ankles with a black marker and pretend you’ve actually got socks on.

Instead, you have no choice but to dress like an 18 year old trying to get into a nightclub, ankles flashing on too short trousers.

I had to spend the rest of my day making sure not to leave my desk so that no one could accuse me, a 44 year old man, of being some kind of Hoxton Hipster from 2015.

“Is that your ankles I can see?” Someone would ask.

And I have to explain that I work in social media marketing and as a part time barista and that this was a uniform, not a choice.

So, from now on, to avoid this happening again I now have a pair of emergency socks in my bag. That way if I ever forget to bring a pair I can break out the emergency socks so that I can walk freely again without showing off my ankles.

Iain

Outdoor Swim Review: Carron Valley – May 2022 (Iain)

I had my fist visit to Carron Valley since the Autumn. The water temperature was 12C which meant it was chilly but not too cold for a swim.

I was hoping the Osprey’s that nest in Carron Valley might be there but there was no sign of them yet. Maybe next time…

Check out the video to see what a swim in Carron Valley Reservoir is like.

Ease of Access: https://goo.gl/maps/vkcjfRm5cx6dYWt7A Park at the gate next to the loch. Its 10m to the waterside. 

Water quality: Warm and shallow at the edge of the loch but it can noticeably drop in temperature the further out you get. 

Swim Quality: Excellent. Lots of things to sight against. Water is choppy but that makes it more fun!

Other People: A couple of folk out walking and the odd car/cyclist going by. 

Would I go back: Yes. It’s my default swim location. 

Iain, Race Report

Loch Leven Half Marathon 2022 (Iain)

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How much trail is on the Loch Leven Half Marathon?

Before the race, I was asked this by two different people. Both were very disappointed when I said “none, its a road race!”

I think people assume its a trail race because there is a nice walking route around the Loch. But it is actually mostly on roads. There is a sneaky little bit of trail right at the end but not much.

The route is an anti-clockwise loop around Loch Leven. I’ve ran the course clock wise and anti clock wise. I did it anti-clockwise the year Andrew I turned up and realized we’d forgotten to enter! We didn’t want to cheat and run with the official runners so went the opposite way instead.

How difficult is it to run a circle in reverse? It turns out it was very difficult. We took a wrong turn and ran 16 miles instead of 13. At one point we ran across a farmers muddy field whilst it was pouring with rain. Considering its a 100% road race I’m not sure how we ended up in a field!

The race race registration and finish line is the local school campus. It was then a near two mile walk to the start line. Some races start in beautiful locations, this one doesn’t. It was side street next to some industrial units.

A woman walked up and down the road shouting at everyone “keep off the road” but it was too little avail. As soon as she passed everyone moved back onto the road.

I was desperate for the loo so I decided to stand in a long queue and see if I could make it to the front before the race started. To succeed at this, , the key is to hold my nerve. As the race gets closer more and more people abandon the queue. I bet that if I held on long enough most people would have left and I’d get a cubicle.

I was correct. Most people left when there was only a couple of minutes left to the start.

The first part of the race is on a partially closed road. Even though it was cloudy it was very warm. I felt good but I was planning on biking for 5 hours the next day so i didn’t push too hard.

The picture does not do justice too how hot and sweaty I was.

The main hill is half way around. Annoyingly this was also the hottest and windiest bit of the course. The wind was against me. Normally i like running up hills but it felt like hard work.

Andrew kicked and left me with about a mile to go. I didn’t have any power so I didn’t even try to keep up. I ended up finishing about 30 seconds behind him.

My aim was sub 1hr 45 min. I did that…just!

Andrew and I at the finish line. I’m 30 seconds behind him.
Andrew

My first Podcast (Andrew)

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When books are converted to films it’s hard to read them again without hearing the voice of the actor that played them. Until then, you will have your own idea of how they sound. Maybe Jack Reacher sound deep and gruff. Or Harry Potter like a chipmunk. Whatever it is, you now hear the voice of Daniel Radcliffe when Harry Potter speaks.

I don’t know what voice you have give me. Am I deep and gruff or do I squeek like a cartoon animal? Either way, if you want to hear what I actually sound like then you’re welcome to listen to the latest Glasgow Triathlon Club podcast where I talk about running every street near my house on a Glasgow A-Z.

You can listen to it hear (and on Apple Podcasts/Spotify etc): Listen here

Andrew, The Sound of Football

The Sound of Football: Brechin (Andrew)

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Every fortnight we cover the best and worst football songs from every club in the UK from our book ‘The Sound Of Football: Every Club, Every Song’. You can buy it here

Brechin City

Nickname: The City

Ground: Glebe Park

Stadium Capacity: 3,960 (Seated 1,519)

Song: Two Can Play That Game

Brechin’s unofficial song is the Tractor Song:

“I can’t read,

And I can’t write,

But that doesn’t really matter…

Cause I’m a Brechin City fan,

And I can drive a tractor!“

(Source: terrace chant)

This celebration of a singular talent is appropriate for Brechin and one player, in particular, Bobby Brown (not the R & B singer).

Manchester United’s Ryan Giggs was a spring chicken fresh from the youth team compared to Brechin’s Brown. While Giggs rewrote record books at Manchester United by playing for over 20 years, there are unsung heroes at other clubs who play on year after year to show that footballing life doesn’t stop at 35, 40 or even… 50 years old.

Between 1983 and 1998, Brown played 444 games for Brechin. What’s remarkable is that he should have played many more. He made his debut for Brechin’s first team three years after joining the club. Even then, he only played one game before he was sent back to the reserves. However, he became an almost permanent fixture on the team sheet once he forced his way back into the first team. We say ‘almost’ because, for a brief time, he was involved in a very peculiar ban when the Scottish Football League wouldn’t let him play. After all, Brechin already had a Bobby Brown playing for them.

In the early 90s, Brechin signed a second Bobby Brown (still not the R&B singer), and the Scottish Football League wouldn’t let both Browns play at the same time because they shared the same name. Brechin had to appeal to FIFA, who ruled there was nothing to stop two players with the same name playing. Or as Bobby Brown (the R&B singer) so famously sang ‘Two Can Play That Game’*

In 1994, Brechin held a testimonial for Bobby and the matchday program revealed the secret of his success: “Bobby has been, is, and always will be, a good professional“. It then added that Bobby was “not blessed with a lot of natural ability, but has produced a level of consistency more talented players will never achieve“.

It’s this consistency that meant Brown was still playing football for Broughty Ferry FC, a non-league side, on his 50th birthday. While standards may have slipped in recent times, it was not by much. In 2008-09 he was Broughty Ferry’s Players’ Player of the Year – at forty-nine. In comparison, his fiftieth year saw him make thirty-seven starting appearances for the club.

It’s legends like Bobby that teams should celebrate. Although Brechin has won leagues titles in the lower reaches of Scottish football and bounced back and forth between the third division and the first, players like Bobby provide the club with the heart and soul and bedrock of consistency that fans crave.

*We suspect this story may be a wind-up from a Brechin fan.

Buy the Sound of Football from Amazon.