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Andrew, Race Report

The Great Scottish Run 2023 Race Report (Andrew)

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If you examine the map above you’ll notice two things about this year’s Great Scottish Run:

First, you’ll notice the route is largely out and back with a large section using the same roads.

Second, you’ll notice most of the route avoids nearly evert park, tree or hint of a plant in the Southside in Glasgow, which is quite an achievement. Glasgow is know as the ‘Dear Green Place’. It has more than 90 parks and gardens. It has beautiful tree lined streets, particularly in the Southside and, yet, the Great Scottish Run chooses to run through some of the most deprived areas and avoid anything which makes Glasgow nice (unless you’re a Rangers fan and love to see a glimpse of Ibrox stadium).

It even finishes in Glasgow Green, one of Glasgow’s biggest parks. But it only uses a few hundred metres as a dash to the finish line. Can they not use more of it? Would you hire a Ferrari to just use it to park it in a Park? Of course not, so why run the Great Scottish Run and not use the very things that make running in Glasgow great.

Great Scottish Run, more like okayish Scottish Run.

At least this year, the route was the correct distance after previous races has seen record had to be scrubbed as the official distance turned out to be less than 13.1 miles. But to do that, they’ve had to add in a 50m detour down a road and then back up again. They couldn’t even add 100m in Glasgow Green. Instead we a Ferrari and a quick spin up to the next level in QPark.

Saying all that, and trying not to be too grumpy, the race is very well organised with groups released in waves to help spread people around the course. There’s three water stops and the route is almost flat.

But if you want to see a tree, try another race. Or try my race. Instead of running around the Southside, howabout running from George Square to Kelvingrove Park, then to the university, the Kelvin walkway, the Botanic Gardens, Great Western Road, Hyndland and Clarence Drive, over to Victoria Park, before back down Dumbarton Road, the banks of the Clyde and longer run through Glasgow Green. Easy.

Andrew, The Sound of Football

The Sound of Football: Elgin City (Andrew)

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Every fortnight we cover the best and worst football songs from every club in the UK from our book ‘The Sound Of Football: Every Club, Every Song’. You can buy it here

Elgin City

Nickname: The Black & Whites

Ground: Borough Briggs

Stadium Capacity: 4,520

Song: Samba Di Janeiro

Since 1917 our sovereign has sent a birthday message to everyone celebrating their 100th birthday. In 1993 Elgin City celebrated its centenary. However, instead of a warm message from the Queen, all it got was a blunt message from the League Management Committee warning Elgin that the club was being stripped of its Highland league title. While birthdays are normally celebrated with cake and a party, Elgin had celebrated its century by cheating to win the Highland League.

Elgin City had ‘won’ the league by four points. Controversy erupted when it was revealed two players should have been ineligible to play Elgin’s final game due to suspension. The player’s suspension was set to begin on Saturday, 24 April, but Elgin had requested its game be brought forward 24 hours. At a League Management Committee meeting on Thursday, 29 April, the league decided that by failing to mention that two of the players faced suspensions when it asked for the change, Elgin had brought the game into disrepute. The Committee voted unanimously to strip Elgin of its title. The Queen, we imagine, was not amused.

Further controversy followed in 2012. Elgin was elected to the Scottish football league in 2000 and had maintained a respectable position in the third division. But, when Glasgow Rangers were required to start again in the third division in 2012, Elgin spotted the chance to raise some additional money by opening its ground to Rangers’ large travelling support by selling nearly 6,000 tickets for its first home game. One problem – the ground only held 4,520.

When the football league spotted the mistake, the game was postponed on health and safety grounds.

Postponing the game meant Elgin missed the chance to go top of the league. Elgin was just two points behind Rangers and would have leapfrogged the Glasgow club if it had won.

Apart from these infamous events, Elgin is famous for winning the Highland League 14 times and being the first and, as yet, only non-league side to reach the quarter-finals of the Scottish Cup.

Elgin’s badge has the Latin slogan ‘sic itur ad astra’, which means ‘thus shall we reach for the star’. Sadly, the team doesn’t use ‘Reach’ by S Club Seven. For the last few years,’ it has played ‘Samba de Janeiro’ whenever they scored, but this ended in 2012. It was probably when it realised that Elgin, as the second most northerly club in the UK, had more in common with the Arctic Circle than the beaches of Brazil.

Andrew, Race Report

Race Report – Forth Road Bridge 10k (Andrew)

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The Forth Road Bridge 10k should be called the The Feast Road Bridge 10k because that’s what you get at the end of the road: a massive feast. Tables and tables laden with sandwiches, fruit, cakes, biscuits and everything you can possibly eat to finish the race with more calories than when you started. No wonder the race sells out within hours of going on sale. Not only do you run over an iconic Scottish bridge, you also get diabetes.

The race starts at the top of a hill and the first few hundred metres are downhill. Then a slight climb before another long downhill. If you like a fast start to a race then this is the race for you. However, do watch out, as the race is hillier than you might think. The Forth Road bridge is not flat and, as it’s exposed to the Firth of Forth, it can be windy too. But, with the thought of all that cake at the finish, it’s a great race to try and run faster to be the first to the buffet.

Andrew, The Sound of Football

The Sound of Football: Edinburgh City (Andrew)

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Every fortnight we cover the best and worst football songs from every club in the UK from our book ‘The Sound Of Football: Every Club, Every Song’. You can buy it here

Edinburgh City FC

Nickname: The Citizens

Ground: Ainslie Park (temporary)

Stadium Capacity: 3,500

Song: The Racecourse Red and Blues 

The Citizen’s created history by becoming the first-ever club to win promotion to the SPFL via the Pyramid Play-Offs,  after winning a second successive Lowland League title in 2015/16. In the years since they have consolidated their position in the SPFL. 

Our search for a song did lead to a fantastic song by Chris Rogers, which was runner up in the Edinburgh FC Song of the Year competition in 2000. After checking more closely, we realised the Edinburgh FC stood for Edinburgh folk club. D’oh! However, the song, an elegy to what it means to be a football fan, is well worth seeking out because who cannot relate to this:

“My father should shoulder the blame,

For starting me off on this way.

It’s never been glory or fame

That brings me back day after day.

Obsession was born in the 60s,

Never was broken again,

A lifetime of pity began with York City,

A nothing-each draw in the rain.”

Andrew, Race Report

Race The Blades Half Marathon 2023 Race Report(Andrew)

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The “Blades” in race the blades refer to the propellors of the wind turbines at Whitelee wind farm, where the race takes place. As the tips of the blades travel at around 300 mph, even an F1 car would have trouble racing the blades. At around 8mph, I might challenge the blades for a race but I would be left in the starting block while it was doing victory laps.

Despite the impossible challenge of the name, Races the Blades is a great off road half marathon held annually in July. There is also a 10k version and ultramarathon option for those who prefer a shorter or a longer challenge.

I’ve entered before and you can find a previous report here. It’s a tricky race, with a rolling course and an annoying hill around the 9 mile point. But, it’s a scenic race with varied train taking you from moorland, to forests to loch side to moorland again with only the sound of the turbines remaining constant. Whumf. Whumf. Whumf.

This year the weather was challenging. The race is held at a wind farm and when it’s windy, it the best spot in the world to be out in the wind. Unless you’re running. In which case it feels like running into jelly. And today was very windy. Except when the heavens opened. Then we were soaked to the skin. It was a real proper Scottish four seasons race. It was just a pity that two of those seasons were hurricane and monsoon.

The race is very well organised and if you like raining on tracks, this is a great event, which is not too far from Glasgow.

Particular praise for the organisers recognising the most important thing for athletes starting a race – plenty of portaloos. Sometimes, when you get to a race, there is only a handful of portaloos for a few hundred runners. Race the Blades had over 20. Fantastic (if you’re looking for a toilet just before you start).

Overall, this is fourth time I’ve run this race and I recommend it to anyone looking for a challenging rolling course through moorland and forests. Just don’t try and race the blades.

Andrew, Swim Review

Outdoor Swim Review: Gourock Outdoor Swimming Pool 2023 (Andrew)

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Gourock Outdoor Pool is Scotland’s oldest heated swimming pool – and also the only one to feature on number one album cover as it was used as the cover image for Blur’s ‘The Life of Darren’ this summer.

Gourock is on the west coast of Scotland is not to be confused with its next door neighbour, Greenock. You can tell the difference between the two because only one regularly features in crime reports (Greenock), while the other is used as an album cover. They may be side be side on the Clyde coast, but Gourock is definitely the better of the two. And the less set of their third neighbour, Port Glasgow, the better. Port Glasgow is where the criminals of Greenock fear to go at night…

Gourock Outdoor Pool is open for Spring and Summer and closed at the end of September. Every Wednesday night is also hosts a night time swim with the pool open between 10 and midnight. You have to buy tickets in advance which you can do here.

Water Quality

The pool uses sea water so the first thing you’ll notice when you swim is the taste of salt in the water. Other than that, the water is nice and clear and the pool is heated to feel like a nice dip on a warm summer’s day, which is not something that happens a lot on the west coast of Scotland.

Swim Quality

I started swimming and was sure I’d swum 1,000 metres only to check my watch to find it was just 700m. I tried again and again I was short. It was only as I was leaving that a man mentioned that the pool was 33m and not 25m. D’oh! I’d set my watch to record 25m laps. No wonder it was taking me 30 seconds longer per 100m! So, in terms of swim quality, remember the pool is longer than average.

As well as being longer than average it also adopt an

Other people

There’s two lanes for lap swimming and a larger open area for casual swimming. It was quite busy on a weekday morning between 9 and 10 but by 10, there was only one other person in the lane.

Overall

A great spot for a swim – a bit of a trek from Glasgow by car, but the train station is next door, which may be easier if you want to try it out.

Andrew, The Sound of Football

The Sound of Football: East Stirlingshire (Andrew)

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Every fortnight we cover the best and worst football songs from every club in the UK from our book ‘The Sound Of Football: Every Club, Every Song’. You can buy it here

East Stirlingshire

Nickname: The Shire

Ground: Ochilview Park

Stadium Capacity: 3,746

Song: The Curse

Former East Stirlingshire player Bobby McCully told the Daily Record a story about the man the club had just appointed its manager in 1974.

“I travelled to training with Tom Donnelly and Davie Robertson in a car and one night [the boss] pulled me aside.

“He said: “It’s some night eh, it’s freezing, you must have got soaked walking from the train station. I told him I always travelled by car with Tom and Davie, but the following week my expenses were missing.

“So I went in to see him and he just gave me the eyes and said: ‘You come by car, you won’t be needing individual expenses’. He’s a shrewd man.”

That man was Sir Alex Ferguson, and East Stirlingshire was the first club to spot his potential.

In 1974, Chairman Willie Muirhead was in Germany watching Scotland in the World Cup finals when he asked Scotland manager Ally McLeod for a name he could recommend as the club’s next manager. The name he suggested was Alex Ferguson.

Sir Alex, at his last press conference before retiring, reflected on his first appointment and how the world has changed since then:

“Forty years almost, 39 years as a manager; 1974, going from that day at East Stirling, eight players, no goalkeeper, to today, six goalkeepers, 100 players or something. I remember the old chairman was a great chain smoker, and I would say: ‘Can you give me a list of players you’ve got?’ And he’d start to shake, his cigarette was going at a hundred miles an hour, and I had to remind him again a couple of days later.

“He gave me a list of players – eight players and no goalkeeper. I said: ‘You know it’s advisable to start with a goalkeeper. Are you aware of that?’ So my first signing was from Partick Thistle, Tom Gourlay. God, he was big. I paid £800, but all the other guys were done for £100 signing-on fees, free transfers.

“And that’s your education.”

Sir Alex was the manager of East Stirlingshire for just 117 days. In that time, he galvanised the club, brought a new-found belief to the players, briefly took them to third place and, most notably for the fans, led them to its first league victory over rivals Falkirk in 70 years.

Remarkably, 117 days has had such an impact on one club, but East Stirlingshire has been Scottish football’s whipping boy for most of its existence.

It was formed in 1880 by a group of friends and neighbours in Falkirk. It took its name from a local cricket club, ‘East Stirlingshire Cricket Club’. Despite early success in the local leagues, the club has struggled since it was admitted to the Scottish football league in 1900. Financial problems at various times in East Fife’s history has seen it let players go to survive; it became the first club in the senior league to have a manager coach for free, while between 2002 and 2007 it finished bottom of the Scottish football league five times in a row, including losing 24 games in a row.

One of its unofficial songs is known as The Curse. It’s called that because every time the fans sing it at opposition teams (changing the lyrics each time), East Stirlingshire loses a goal before they get to the song’s end. A typical verse goes like this:

“1 man & 1 sheep went to play for Montrose

1 man & 1 sheep went to play for Montrose

1 man & 2 sheep went to play for Montrose

1 man & 2 sheep went to play for Montrose

1 man & 3 sheep went to play for Montrose

1 man & 3 sheep went to play for Montrose

1 man & 4 sheep went to play for Montrose

1 man & 4 sheep went to play for Montrose

1 man & 5 sheep went to play for Montrose

1 man & 5 sheep went to play for Montrose

1 man & 6 sheep went to play for Montrose

1 man & 6 sheep went to play for Montrose

1 man & 7 sheep went to play for Montrose

1 man & 7 sheep went to play for Montrose

1 man & 8 sheep went to play for Montrose

1 man & 8 sheep went to play for Montrose

1 man & 9 sheep went to play for Montrose

1 man & 9 sheep went to play for Montrose

1 man & 10 sheep went to play for Montrose

1 man & 10 sheep went to play for Montrose

The whole Montrose team is made up of sheep

The whole Montrose team is made up of sheep”

(Source: terrace chant)

Other versions for other teams refer to “one man & one bridie went to Forfar” and “one man & one ship went to Stranraer”.

Here’s a tip for East Stirlingshire fans: if your team, which needs every point it can get, loses a goal every time you sing this song – you stop singing it. However, the fans haven’t listened, and the club was relegated from the SPFL in 2016.

Buy the Sound of Football from Amazon.

Andrew, The Sound of Football

The Sound of Football: East Fife (Andrew)

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Every fortnight we cover the best and worst football songs from every club in the UK from our book ‘The Sound Of Football: Every Club, Every Song’. You can buy it here

East Fife

Nickname: The Fife

Ground: New Bayview Stadium

Stadium Capacity: 1,980

Song: The Cowden Family

When Rangers beat Hibernian 7 – 0 in December 1995, Gordon’ Jukebox’ Durie scored four times. You might expect a man who scored four goals to make every paper’s back page, but not this time. Gordon played with Paul ‘Gazza’ Gascoigne, and everyone remembers what Gazza did instead of Gordon’s goals.

Midway through the match, referee Douglas Smith dropped his yellow card. Gazza picked it up and tried to give it back, but not before, with a flourish, he pretended to book the referee.

Douglas Smith was not amused, though all the fans were laughing, and Smith grabbed the card back, turned the tables on the Georgie joker, and booked him for dissent.

When questioned by Hibs player Joe Tortolano about why he had booked Gazza, Douglas is reported to have told Joe: “He might be able to take the piss out of you, but he’s not taking the piss out of me!” 

In 2012, Gordon’ Jukebox’ Durie was appointed manager of East Fife, the club where he began his career, but, due to illness, he only lasted a few months before he had to step down. 

With his local knowledge, Gordon will know East Fife’s finest musical achievement. In 1996, East Fife fans made national news when they appeared on the BBC comedy programme ‘They Think It’s All Over’ to sing their version of the Addams Family theme-tune: The Cowden Family, directed at their rivals Cowdenbeath.

“They come fae near Lochgelly

They hivnae goat a telly

Their dirty and their smelly

The Cowden Family“

(Source: terrace chant)

Buy the Sound of Football from Amazon.