Every fortnight we cover the best and worst football songs from every club in the UK from our book ‘The Sound Of Football: Every Club, Every Song’. You can buy it here

Colchester United

Nickname: The U’s

Ground: Weston Homes Community Stadium

Stadium Capacity: 10,105

Song: Up The U’s

If you are interested in alternative music, then one name will immediately come to mind: Steve Lamacq.

Steve’s tireless championing of new music on his long-running shows on Radio 1 and Radio 6 Music has delivered the first UK radio exposure for Oasis, Coldplay, and every guitar band who’s emerged on the UK alternative music scene in the last 20 years. In-between attending hundreds of gigs each year, Steve has another love: Colchester FC. On 23 January 2006, he combined both passions by playing the team’s anthem ‘Up the U’s’ on Radio 1’s Evening Session.

The song is ironic: Colchester is the setting for the famous nursery rhyme Humpty Dumpty. During the English Civil War, a sniper known as Humpty Dumpty, due to his large size, sat in the belfry of a church (Humpty Dumpty sat on the wall.) He was shot down (Humpty Dumpty had a great fall) and, shortly after, the town was overrun by Parliamentarians (all the king’s horses and all the king’s men/couldn’t put Humpty together again), which is why, instead of singing ‘Up the U’s, an appropriate fairy tale ending for Colchester would find them falling down the divisions.

The club has had moderate success. With a population of just over 100k, it has punched above its weight and regularly features in the top half of League 1. Its greatest achievement was a victory over Don Revie’s all-conquering Leeds United side of the 1970s. A result that put all of the Colchester players involved into the club’s player hall of fame.

The club anthem is ‘Up the U’s’, and Colchester based punk band Special Duties has recorded the song twice.

Special Duties was originally called X-pelled, but they switched names when a box of badges with “Special Duties” printed on them ‘came into their possession’. Allegedly the badges were stolen from a local Colchester school. They changed their name to fit the badges rather than print more badges with X-Pelled written on them.

Buy the Sound of Football from Amazon.

Every fortnight we cover the best and worst football songs from every club in the UK from our book ‘The Sound Of Football: Every Club, Every Song’. You can buy it here

Clyde FC

Nickname: The Bully Wee

Ground: Broadwood Stadium

Stadium Capacity: 8,029

Song: The Song Of The Clyde

The lyrics to Clyde’s song ‘Song Of The Clyde’ are the perfect description of what it means to be a Clyde fan. The second verse includes the lines:

“I’ll follow them east, and I’ll follow them west

Tae the north or the south still it’s ‘my team’s the best.’

So come down tae [insert name of the current stadium] you’ll know I’ve not lied

When I tell you the greatest of team is the Clyde.“

(Source: unknown)

Clyde’s a nomadic team, which is why we’ve written “[insert name of the current stadium]” in the above lyrics. The supporters originally sang of Shawfield Stadium in the south side of Glasgow before they relocated in 1994 to a new stadium in Cumbernauld, a town to the north of Glasgow.

In 2015 there were reports that it would be on the move again after falling out with its landlord, North Lanarkshire Council, over unpaid rent for Broadwood. This time it would move back to East Kilbride, another town to the south of Glasgow. In total, Clyde has had six grounds since it formed in 1877. However, returning closer to its original southside home will not guarantee that fans will follow. In its final season in Shawfield, Clyde averaged 940 fans a game. In Cumbernauld, it has averaged 1,100, and many of those fans may not want to travel across Glasgow to see Clyde’s new home.

While Clyde may have a small fan base today, it was once considered one of Scotland’s bigger teams. It played in the top division of Scottish football until 1976 and won the Scottish Cup in 1939, 1955 and 1958. However, the late twentieth century was not a good time to be a Clyde fan. After Clyde’s owners sold the stadium, relegation from the topflight was followed by financial problems and, ultimately, the decision to leave its home in Shawfield.

Between 1986 and 1994, Clyde shared a ground with its hated rivals Partick Thistle (imagine Manchester United sharing with Manchester City, and you’ll have a good idea what fans thought of this move) and then with Hamilton Academicals before it was persuaded to play in Cumbernauld. North Lanarkshire Council promised Clyde a purpose-built stadium. Although 6,000 people attended Clyde’s first game, 5,000 didn’t come back. The stadium’s proximity to Glasgow meant local supporters would bypass Broadwood and go straight to Ibrox and Celtic Park for their football fix. However, while talks of a move have gone quiet, the fans know one thing:

“I’ll follow them East, and I’ll follow them West

Tae the North or the South still its ‘my teams the best‘”

(Source: unknown)

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