My wife asked how many Mission Impossible films had been been made. I said eight. She said never.

“You’ve seen the first seven at least twice each,” I said.

“I don’t remember them,” she said, “there’s the one which starts in a restaurant.”

“That’s the first one,” I said.

“And the one where there’s a woman, and she’s the ‘bad guy’, and she’s on a train.”

“That’s the first one too.”

“Oh, and there’s the one where Tom Cruise hangs from a rope and steals something.”

“That’s also the first one.”

“Oh, then there’s the one he’s hanging off a building.”

“That’s the fourth one.”

“And the one with a desert storm.” She said.

“Also the fourth one.”

“Is that not all of them?”

Which means, according to my wife, there’s only been two Mission Impossible films, the first and the fourth ones – and not eight at all, which must be disappointing for Tom Cruise to hear after spending 30 years of his life running, jumping, hanging off things and generally risking his life for our entertainment.

It’s the same though with triathlons. No one keeps track of how many you do and no one, except you, can ever remember more than one of them afterwards.

For me, whenever someone asks me about triathlons (which is not often but occasionally happens with small talk), they always ask me about jumping off a ferry in Norway.

“You jumped off a ferry, didn’t you?” They ask.

And I say “yes” and then switch the conversation to pass over the fact I didn’t complete Norseman after getting hypothermia in the bike leg – more here.

I wonder if Tom Cruise has similar conversations.

“Hello Tom Cruise, you jumped off a mountain in Norway, didn’t you.”

He says “yes” and then moves the conversation on so he doesn’t have to talk about Dead Reckoning.

I guess what I’m trying to say is that while triathlons are fun and challenging – don’t expect anyone else to be interested in them. Even if you’re Tom Cruise.